Project: A child in divorce. To perceive. To understand. To support.
Area 2. Promoting social diversity and preventing exclusion
According to Statistics Poland, more than 30,000 couples divorced here in 2021. This was as much as 18.6 per cent more than in the previous year. In Poland, the number of divorces per 100 marriages is 35.6. And yet, there are also informal unions sometimes breaking down. In every divorce, at least two people in crisis are involved. And what if someone else is there: a child?
In such a case, it is worth trying family mediation. In this service, the mediator’s role is to support the parents in sorting out their disputes while paying attention to the child’s situation and feelings.
“This year, the Pelican Association has introduced a new tool which helps include the child’s perspective in the mediation process. We learned this from experienced colleagues in the Czech Republic, where there is a thriving centre for family mediation,” – says Agnieszka Tulin-Kardaś, the Pelikan Association.
The Association’s project was a pilot, implemented in cooperation with a Czech mediation centre in Brno. It is a model of mediation involving directly the voice of the child, which, as the available research indicated and the Association’s experience confirmed, works.
“We have observed that children very much need […] to be listened to, to be given the feeling that they are important. This reduces stress levels and allows them to express their feelings and expectations. […] Such activities relieve children of a sense of responsibility for what happens in the family and for adult decisions. From the parents’ testimonies, it seems that the children have already shed a heavy burden after meetings with the specialist,” Agnieszka Tulin-Kardaś says.
In the pilot project, 27 mediation processes were carried out with 33 children involved. This model of mediation has proved to increase parental awareness, give children a chance to speak out on issues that are important to them, and significantly influence parents’ subsequent care decisions, the sustainability of solutions and the level of satisfaction of all parties.
The aim of the ‘Child in Divorce’ project was to start a process of changing public awareness of how to deal with post-divorce conflicts and, in particular, to protect the welfare of the child, his or her emotional stability, ability to form close relationships and proper social functioning in the future.
Educational workshops for parents and children and the offer of individual support for parents in transition were also part of the project. A publication ‘Standards and good practices in family mediation’ was developed, aimed at both mediators and those participating in or interested in mediation. A discussion and exchange of experiences was also initiated among representatives of institutions working with families at different stages of the perinatal crisis, which will help to build inter-institutional partnerships in the future.
Publication “Standards and good practices in family mediation”
Interview with Agnieszka Tulin-Kardaś, The Pelikan Association
